If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
We just shotgunned beers for America
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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