sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
