If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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