Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
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