Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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