It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
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