Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Randomize
