is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
