Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
