What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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