I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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