Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Randomize
