there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
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