WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Randomize
