Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
