I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
