I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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