So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Randomize
