No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
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