Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Randomize
