Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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