There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize