Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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