she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
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