maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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