Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
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