scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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