After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
fuck your aforementioned shoe
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Randomize
