Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
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