Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
