Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
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