We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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