i think my mom watched the whole time
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
Come see our sink grown plant.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
there is puke in my bra ... again
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