FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
