He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Randomize
