Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
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