I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
My breasts were aching with rage.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize
