Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Randomize
