i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
The air was thick with penises
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
as a side note pls kill me
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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