I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
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