i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
