you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize
