She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
