you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
You're a waste of cheezeits
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Can you bring me the toilet please
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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