It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
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