I don't remember. Are we still dating?
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
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