Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Randomize
