White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
third nipple confirmed
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
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