im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
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