i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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